Self-reflective questions

Through recent sessions, I have gained insight into questions that can help guide conversations, identify needs, and create a path forward. These questions are self-reflective and can be applied to any situation.

 The first question is "Why is this a problem for me?" When discussing co-parenting, the answer often focuses on the personality or behavior of the other parent. However, since we cannot control others, we must ask ourselves, "How can I change my thinking or behavior to adapt to this trait of theirs?" This self-reflection is crucial for creating a more peaceful environment. Sometimes, the root of the problem is our unwillingness to participate in a solution. If we blame others for our problems, we overlook our role in the conflict.

 The second question is "What can I do to improve this?" This question may be difficult for those who blame others for their situation because it requires self-reflection and acknowledging personal power. When we hold others responsible for our problems, we relinquish control and fail to consider our options. We can work towards a resolution that benefits both parties by reclaiming our power and seeking solutions instead of placing blame.

 In considering solutions, it's important to ask yourself the question, "Who does this serve?" This helps you determine if your concerns have been addressed and if the solution benefits everyone involved.

 We cannot rely on others to make us happy, nor can we blame them for our unhappiness. Our emotions and perceptions are our own responsibility. To move forward in difficult conversations, it's helpful to remain flexible with our approach and accountable for our responses. Being rigid in our perceptions of conflicts and solutions can hinder progress and prevent mutually beneficial resolutions.

Always happy to hear your thoughts, problems, or examples.

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