Get to the point. GTTP
It sounds aggressive, maybe even confrontational. We probably wouldn’t say it in conversation with strangers, but we have probably dropped it on our friends and family despite its negative tone. It's a phrase that echoes in coaching and mediation sessions. One party will express their thoughts, and the other will impatiently demand they 'get to the point.
Sometimes it’s blurted out to be dismissive. To get rid of the ‘mumbo jumbo.’ Which, typically, in my cases, means ‘feelings.’ One party will talk about their feelings on a particular issue, and the other will snap, “Get to the point.”
As a facilitator, recognizing the value of both aspects helps create a more empathetic and effective dialogue. It's about balancing the need to convey essential information with the understanding that each participant is experiencing their thoughts and feelings. This balance can lead to more meaningful and respectful conversations. The 'point' and the 'mumbo jumbo' are significant in the resolution process. The 'point' often represents the core message or goal, while the 'mumbo jumbo' can include the context, emotions, and nuances that enrich the interaction.
"Get to the point" signals a lack of interest in listening. The assumption is that we’ve already heard what’s being said. We don’t need to hear it again; we need them to “Get to the point.” It implies irrelevance; and the listener usually tunes out if the speaker doesn't GTTP promptly. Mediation and conflict coaching are only effective if both parties are committed to listening to each other. Engaging in effective dialogue facilitates resolution.
In an ever-increasingly fast-paced world, our desire to be more time efficient has us secretly or out loud wanting people to GTTP faster, more often. So, how can we speed up the point and also have it be an equally engaging dialogue? Change the statement GTTP, to a question. Don’t judge what they are saying, be curious about what they are saying.
Get To the point changes to Are we still talking about the same thing?
That statement seeks clarification on what is being discussed and where it’s going. Whatever you choose to say, have it look for understanding, not a destination.
In a conversation with a friend about this blog post, she mentioned that the phrase "GTTP" can unintentionally convey that one's perspective isn't valued. This struck me as significant in personal relationships, even though the intent behind "GTTP" isn't to cause harm. The comfort of intimacy allows for its use, but that same intimacy can make it feel more hurtful. When people feel their contributions are disregarded, they're less likely to engage in dialogue.
Being told to GTTP is a great time to remember baseball and conflicts. Stay focused on responses that remain curious and seek common ground.
GTTP can sometimes act as a communication barrier when individuals use it to expedite the resolution process. Nonetheless, when executed efficiently, responses to GTTP can aid in pinpointing specific issues at hand. Just like any other statement switch-ups, it is crucial to make sure that they are in line with the resolution's intended goal, which can assist in ensuring they are positively accepted and on track for engaging dialogue.
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